The Great Chase

The Old Guy's usual morning routine is to make coffee, get the paper, take the Pretty Lady a cup of coffee, turn on the TV, sit down and drink his coffee and read the paper. After he sits down, there is usually some running, thumping, growling and general cat play between Pinot and Chow. Today, while he was reading the paper he heard collar bells ringing, feet thumping up the front stair case and then feet thumping on the living room floor. When he looked up Pinot was just racing off the top of the stairs and onto the top of the couch. He double taked when he saw the chasor . . . me. I finished my run going past Pinot and up the the bedroom landing. Then, I turned around and ran full speed to the front staircase and full speed down. As I ran by, Pinot jumped off the couch and chased me down the stairs. Playing chase is much more fun than I originally thought.

Good God Man, Bury That Thing!

This is a follow-up to the last blog. This morning, while the Old Guy was brushing me he said, "Geez, what stinks?" Then he took off the top of my kitty litter and there was a 4" long turd sitting on top of the sand. I think his next words were something like "Holy S..T" (hey, I'm only 2, I don't repeat language like that). Well, I'll tell you this . . . It Wasn't Mine!!!!

Pinot, if you're going to use the ladies room, at least flush!

Excuse Me, You're in the Ladys' Room!

We live in an unusual house. It has a living room, an office, a den, 3 bedrooms, 3 bathrooms and 4 kitty litters. Three of the kitty litters are in the house and one is in the garage. The one in the garage is the one I have used since I moved in. There used to be a small one in my cage, but when I got used to things the Old Guy set up a big one with a top on it, and put it next to my cage.

The Old Guy cleans the kitty litters almost every day. Today he came in with 3 big white jugs full of kitty litter. I guess he went shopping. He cleaned and refilled the 3 kitty litters in the house, which Chow and Pinot use, and then he went into the garage where he cleaned and refilled mine. Within a minute after he cleaned my kitty litter, and while he was stacking the empty kitty litter jugs he heard scratching in my kitty litter. He turned around to look. All he could see was the kitty litter with the top on it and a big orange head sticking out with a serene look on its face.

EXCUSE ME PINOT, BUT YOU ARE IN THE LADYS' ROOM!!!!!

Poachin' My Scratch

The Old Guy came home for lunch today. After he finished, he came in the garage to see if I was there. I wasn't, but when I hear him go into the garage I usually come running because I know he will either give me some food or give me a good scratch. There is a folding chair in the garage which he keeps set up near my cage. In the old days he would sit in the chair and talk to me when I was new, and later, after I had been here a few weeks, drag me out of the cage for a scratch. He still keeps the chair in the same place and when he sits in the chair I know I'll get a scratch or brushing if I come over to him. I love to be scratched and I like brushings even more, especially on both sides of my chin. It's when I purr the loudest, oh yeah, and drool.

So, he came in and sat down and I came a running over to him for my scratch. He picked me up and I laid on his lap facing away from the door purring loudly. He started to brush me. It was goooood! After a few brushings the rythym changed. He would do a few brushes and then stop for a few seconds and then do a few more and so on. Also, something smelled funny, kind of like Chow Mein. After a few minutes of brushing I looked behind me and could see Chow standing and the Old Guy was giving him a brushing in between my brushings. Wait A Minute!!!

I started to growl and tried to break free but the Old Guy held on and started to brush me faster. No Way!!! Finally he gave up and I jumped down. By then Chow was laying on his side next to the chair streched out in the universal scratching position. I stood staring at him about a foot away and growled. He just laid there and watched. Then I growled and lifted my paw. Ah Ha! That got his attention. He jumped up, kind of gave me a funny look and ran out of the garage into the house. That will teach him. No one poaches my scratch!

Who Knew It Was a Duplex?

The new, and much improved feeding arrangement is the Old Guy feeds Chow and Pinot in the kitchen and then I follow him into the garage where he feeds me . . . and closes the garage doors so Pinot and Chow can't come in and poach my food. Finally, I can eat in peace. I guess now that Chow, Pinot and I are friends, he figures that he doesn't need to play the food card to get us to know each other.

Speaking of knowing each other, my favorite place to sleep is the big doll house. I either sleep in one of the first or second floor rooms. Today, as I was laying on the second floor, Pinot came along. He jumped on the roof, which is the only place he will fit, stretched out, and went to sleep. Who knew the doll house was a duplex?

A Much Needed Vacation

This weekend I learned a few things about Chow and Pinot. First off, they like food a lot more than I do. Secondly, they are much more interested in me than I am in them. Thirdly, they are much more curious about the inside of the garage than I am curious about the inside of the house. Finally, even though I know them pretty well, they still kind of freak me out.

The Old Guy could tell I have been a little stressed. I generally won't let him pick me up in the house, only in the garage. Eating is a little tense, with the big guys on the floor, and the Old Guy having to chase me around the house and watch me eat on the counter. Last night was calm. But this morning, while Pinot and Chow were bouncing around I kind lf laid low. Finally, the Old Guy caught me but I didn't feel like eating. Also, I growled, squirmed, and gave him a tidy scratch that drew some blood. Sorry Old Guy, but I couldn't help myself. The Old Guy is pretty smart though. He said, "Minette, you need a vacation." So, he carried me into the garage and we sat down and he brushed me. I purred really loud and was really relaxed until Pinot ran in and laid down in my cage. The Old Guy had to drag him out and put him in the house, after which he closed the doors to the garage. Peace At Last!!!!! I forgot what quiet was. Last the old guy saw me, I was sleeping in my doll house.

And The Walls Came a Tumblin' Down

Lots going on here. My entry to the garage is still over the cat gate. Chow can jump the gate too. On Friday night the Old Guy was doing something in the garage. I decided to join him, so I jumped in over the gate. Then Chow decided to join us. Up and over. Well, poor Pinot was standing outside the gate looking worried. The next thing we knew, he was climbing the gate. Keep in mind it's only about 30 inches tall. He was climbing it like it was a mountain wall, one inch at a time. Well, I guess all the times Chow and I had jumped the gate had loosened it from the doorway, and also, well, Pinot is a bit of a plus size. As Pinot got close to the top, the gate gave way . . . timmmm----berrrrrrr. In crashed the gate with Pinot on it!!!! He was ok, I mean it was a fall of about 12 inches. But, we all freaked of course.

More news. Today the Old Guy took the gate down. The two garage doors to the house are always open so we all play in the garage whenever we want.

Now that there is no cate gate the Old Guy decided to feed all of us in the kitchen which is where Chow and Pinot used to eat before I came along. I guess the Old Guy was concerned about whether I would eat there or not. So he held me while he served up the food, and I got to eat . . . on the counter top!!! Wow, no cat gets to eat on the counter. I heard the Old Guy tell the Pretty Lady . . . "Don't tell the kids I'm doing this, they'll think I've gone crazy."

It Was a Dark and Stormy Night: NOT!!!

Last night everyone slept in the house the entire night. I even played with the boys. Our playtime began at 4:45 a.m. A little early for the Old Guy, but hey, whose house does he think this is anyway?

Chow is really a party animal. Who knew? There is a pint of kat nip on top of my cage in the garage. This morning while the old guy was reading his paper he heard a "clunk" on the steps leading up to the bedroom. He walked over and there was the pint of kat nip, with a tooth hole in the top. Chow had jumped into the garage and onto the top of the cage. Picked up the kat nip container in his teeth, jumped back over the cat gate into the house and carried it up to the Old Guy. The Old Guy sprinkeled it all over the toy basket, the busy kitty and the cat scratch post. Wow!!! Party On!!!!

Dark and Stormy Night III

Last night the Old Guy just threw me in the garage and closed the door before he went to bed. Geeez, one little hiss and growl. His last words to me were "I need some sleep tonight!".

Happy Anniversary

Hard to believe, but it has been exactly 3 months since that fatefull day on which I was kidnapped. I spent the day mainly sleeping in the doll house. The Old Guy gave me and the boys tuna juice and tuna remnants for a snack (he kept the good stuff for himself). I got a good brushing too. I have to admit, living in Manhattan Beach at the Old Guy's house ain't bad. I think I've put on a few pounds too. Gotta go, Barbie's head beckons.

Dark and Stormy Night II

I'm dictating this from the garage with the doors shut. Everything seemed to go ok last night. I actually slept really soundly in the cat toy basket surrounded by Barbie's hair. Can't get enough of that. In the middle of the night I woke up to growling and a hiss. For once it wasn't me. I guess the Old Guy got up and was looking for Chow. He ususally sleeps on their bed but didn't come up there. The Old Guy found him on top of the knick knack cabinet which is where he goes to be safe. The growling and hiss came when the Old Guy tried to drag him down. The Old Guy got him to sleep on the bed. Unfortunately, when morning came (it was still dark), and it was feeding time we had a hiss-a-thon. The Old Guy snapped and I ended up in the garage with my food and the doors closed. Of course I made him chase me around the house first!

It Was a Dark and Stormy Night

Actually, it was only dark. I almost made it through my first night in the house without getting thrown in the garage. As I say, almost. The evening started when Alexa, the little guy and the cat-like creature left. I was let in the house. I admit to being nervous, hence my slinking, rather than walking, around the house. Every now and then I ran into Chow and Pinot and of course I hissed.

Then everyone went to bed. Except me of course. I guess Chow usually sleeps on the bed between the Old Guy and the Pretty Lady. Well, Chow was very concerned about my presence so he kept jumping up and checking me out. I lurked around the bed and whenever I saw him I hissed or growled or both. I guess this gets to be pretty loud at 3 in the morning even though I thought I was hissing and growling at my normal level. Finally, the Old Guy got up after Chow jumped off the bed and landed near me. I guess my growl was a little louder than usual. Next thing I know, I'm in the garage with the door closed. I howled, but I don't think he could hear me.

However, when morning came, we all got fed (me in the cat gate and the boys outside of the cat gate) and then I hopped the gate and hissed and everything's normal, if you can call a house with three cats normal.

Joining the Boys Club

This has been an eventful weekend. On Friday, another pretty lady showed up with some interesting baggage. Her name is Alexa. She brought along a little guy (Eli) and a large cat-like creature named Daisy. I wasn't allowed to meet the cat-like creature because the Old Guy said it might freak me out and freak the cat-like creature out too. So I spent a lot of time alone in the garage this weekend.

However, the Old Guy did let me into the house a couple of times when the cat-like creature was gone. And a couple of times I let myself in by climbing over the cat gates. One time I climbed into the house and then the Old Guy chased me and I climbed back into the garage.

Alexa and the little guy and the cat-like creature left this afternoon. Next thing I know, the top cat gate is gone. Now there's only one low wire gate. If I can climb over two gates, I can easily hop over this one. Well, after he removed the top cat gate he brought me into the house and that's where I have been since about 7:00 tonight. I've been exploring, hissing, growling, but mostly exploring and meowing. This place is big. Pinot followed me around. One time I ended up in the cat toy box. There's lots of good stuff in there. Some toys are filled with cat nip and I went nuts on Barbie's head. Pinot watched. He said he likes Barbie's head too. Don't know where her body is and don't much care. Her head is where all the action is at. It's so fluffy, and it rolls. It's really fun.

Next I walked downstairs and growled at Chow. Chow just looked at me and then turned his back to continue looking out the window. Then I explored the office. Man, there's a lot of neat stuff in there.

So, I have finally joined the Boys Club. Things will never be the same Gentlemen. The Lady is about to take over!!!!

There's Some Hissin' in the House

So, we get home . . . finally. Chow and Pinot are let out in the house and I'm let out in the gagage. But, hey, I'm a people person now, don't ya know! So I walked around the garage howling. I want people. The Old Guy came in and held me, brushed me, talked to me, and so on. He went to work and when he came home he fed us. I didn't hiss as much as I normally do. Then the Old Guy went up to talk to the pretty lady and I figured I'd take matters into my own paws. I climbed the cat gates and howled. The Old Guy turned around and we were pretty much eye-to-eye, much to his chagrin. He came in and put rakes up around the cat gates. No problem. When he left I knocked them down and climbed back up. He came back in and grabbed me. But this time, to my surprise, he brought me in the house and put me on the floor. I looked up and there was Pinot. I hissed and growled. Pinot laid down and rolled over. What a wuss. Chow laid on the glass table and watched me. I admit I was a little nervous. So, I creeped around the top floor of the house. I looked in every nook and cranny. Pinot followed me around and every now and then, he blocked my way out. When he did that I gave him a good hissin'. Interesting, but he always backed down and got out of my way. And Chow, well Chow never left the top of the table. So finally after about a hundred hisses, growls, and yowls, the Old Guy said enough. He picked me up and back to the garage I went. But he said I can come out again when Daisy (who's Daisy) is gone. I guess the mysterious Daisy was locked in a room. So, I'm back in the garage and the door where the cat gates are, is presently closed. So I'm sleeping on a surf bag that Derek bought for me. Thanks Derek!

WTF? The Conclusion

I'm in a cage, in a room, with other cats in cages, including Pinot and Chow. I'm in my kitty litter. I don't plan to move. As if I could do anything except just sit and stare. Well, they know I can't move a paw. And I won't. I'll just sit here and be quiet, just in case they do suspect me.
They're probably watching me. Well, let them. Let them see what kind of cat I am.
A fly has landed upon her paw.
I'm not even going to eat that fly. I hope they are watching. They'll see. They'll see, and they'll know, and they'll say... (as she slowly raises his eyes to meet ours, smirking) 'Why, she wouldn't even harm a fly!' [with apologies to Alfred Hitchcock]. So, what can I say. The Old Guy ditched us at the Airport Kennel. Seems he's going to NYC for the week. Ok, for the first two days I stayed in the kitty litter. But, due to popular demand and outright food bribery, I warmed up and let the people pet me, carry me, brush me, and, finally (oh the horror), bathe me and cut my nails. When the Old Guy came to pick me up, I yowled all the way home. Then when I was in the garage I continued yowlling. I checked out everything, tried to run in the house, yowlled some more. The Old Guy appologized over and over. He brushed me, gave me treats, carried me, pleaded with me . . . ok, so maybe I'll forgive him. I haven't decided on the exchange rate for forgiveness yet. I'll let him suffer a little.

WTF?

An ordinary day today. I hear stirring at 6:15 a.m. The coffee grinder goes off at 6:20. The Old Guy feeds Chow and Pinot outside of the cat gate at 6:25 and me, inside the cat gate. Later the Old Guy comes in and gives me a scratch and plays.

Then, at about 2:30, the Old Guy comes in and pulls something long and black down from a shelf and puts it on the floor and unzips something. Then he talks sweet to me, picks me up, gives me a quick scratch, says he's sorry, and then stuffs me into the long black thing and zips it up. Trapped like a rat!

Next, I find out that he's also trapped Chow and Pinot. Chow is moaning, Pinot is saying, "Wow, this is cool". The Old Guy carried us, along with three blankets (USC, Kings, Dodgers) to the car, put us in and closed the door. Then we drove for like 3 hours (10 minutes) and ended up at a really strange place. The three of us lay in our cages while the Old Guy talked to some lady about treats, play time, who stays together, and who doesn't, and a bath and toe nail clipping.

Then, the three of us are taken down stairs to a room with a bunch of big cages (they call them Cat Condos, I call them cages). Chow and Pinot went into one double condo, and I got a single. The Old Guy put me in. I hissed, growled and then went and laid down in the kitty litter. Oh yeah, he threw in three mousies into each cage. Then he said he was sorry and left.

WTF?

Alas Poor Earwig, I Knew You Well

After the Old Guy got over the shock of seeing me standing on top of the cat gate, he came into the garage for our evening ritual. After my brushing I pranced around the garage and wouldn't let him pick me up. Then, to my surprise, a wild animal went running across the garage floor. Well, it didn't run very fast but it sure was interesting. I crouched down and pounced, then I batted, then I danced, then I batted, then I fained disinterest, then I attacked. This went on for about 10 minutes until the wild animal just lay there. The Old Guy called it an Earwig. I called it snack.

What Are You Looking At?

Two blogs tonight. This is the first. At about 11:30 the Old Guy came down to put me to bed. The routine is he comes in, hugs and pets and brushes me, and then turns on one of the small garage lights and then turns out the big overhead lights. Well, as he came down the stairs tonight I gave him a not so little surprise. As he got to the cat gates, he and I were looking eye-to-eye. That's right, I had climbed the gates and was clinging to the top. I meowed to him, "What are you looking at?". He didn't seem amused. I hadn't decided whether I was going in or not because that's when the Old Guy showed up. He plucked me from the top of the gate and took me back into the garage. Then he frantically looked around for the third gate which he had taken down but he couldn't find it. So, he put the top of the garden rake leaning against the top gate. I guess he figures that if I climb up there tonight, at least he'll have notice.

Cleaning Day at the Zoo

Right now I'm pouting. Every couple of weeks or so a really wierd thing happens at the house. In the morning I can tell that the Old Guy is a little tense. Feeding time is normal, getting chased in the garage is normal, but about 10:00 a.m. the Old Guy gets really nice to me. He talks soft, he pets me and brushes me. Then he throws me in the cage with only the kitty litter.

I've talked to Chow and Pinot about this (in between hissy fits), and they tell me that it's house cleaning day. Chow says he knows in advance when this day is going to occur because the Pretty Lady puts an envelope with money in it on the kitchen counter. Chow says that when the envelope goes up on the counter, he's goes out of sight because it means he's going to get locked in one of the bedrooms for a couple of hours. Today for example he said he was going to hide on the top of the knick-nack shelf, which is only about one foot from the ceiling in the dining room. Maybe that's why, after the Old Guy threw me in the cage, I saw him come in the garage mumbling to himself and grab the step ladder. I guess he sneeks up on Chow when he is on the top of the shelf, grabs him, and runs to Derek's room and throws Chow on the bed. Chow told me that he tries to resist with a major claw attack but that the Old Guy is too strong and too fast. I suggested that a nasty bite might be effective. Heck, it's worked for me.

Anyway, Pinot's take on the whole thing is that it's no big deal. He said the room is dark and cool, that he's usually sleeping during the day anyway and that they get let out by 2:00. He said he actually follows the Old Guy and Chow down the stairs to see if the Old Guy is going to make it before Chow freaks. Well, my take on it is that it sucks because it reminds me of the old days (July) when I lived in the cage. I didn't think the house was that dirty anyway and I liked all of the unusual smells. When their done, the whole place smells the same which is really kind of boring. Oh well, back to pouting.

Mousie

Two short stories about mousies. Yesterday, the Old Guy went off to surf. He keeps his board in my garage. When he got back he pulled a very wet red mousie out of his board shorts pocket and gave it to me. He said when he went to put on his leash, Red Mousie was stuck to the velcro. Wow, that means Red Mousie went surfing.

About a month ago, the Old Guy tied a big grey mousie to my cage with about 2 feet of string. I think he did this because I lost all of the other mousies he gave me. Sometimes, the Old Guy and I play a game. I lay on the furry mat by the refridgerator in the garage, and he throws the mousie at me. Since it is tied up it kind of takes off and then snaps when it gets to the end of the string. When it lands, I attack it. Yesterday, I got really excited and I chewed it really hard and growled at it. I like playing with the Old Guy and Grey Mousie.

Nice Kitty

Tonight Chow Mein and I kissed. I was standing at the cat fence and Chow was really close. He stuck his nose up to the fence and I stuck my nose up to the fence and our noses touched. I was so surprised that I don't remember what happend next. I probably stepped back and hissed.

Chaos

Well, the garage doors were in but they didn't work. Apparently the Old Guy was supposed to have an electrician come out before the doors were installed to have plugs put in for each of the three garage door motors but he says he forgot. So, for the next two days the old guy was moving stuff around the garage like a mechanical man, with the doors down and it was 85 degrees outside and at least 90 inside. It turns out that he could have opened the doors manually but he told me he didn't want to confine me to my cage because he felt sorry for me. "Well", I replied, "It didn't seem to bother you too much when the screeching was going on. And please recall, that you put me in the cage while the electrician was working yesterday, and then when the Pretty Lady came in to work, the first words out of her mouth were 'put the cat in the cage and open all of the doors because it's too hot in here.'"

Once upon a time, when I was first introduced to the garage, everything was perfect. When I finally was allowed out of my cage, I walked around and sniffed everything. Of course most of it was junk and there appeared to be no rhyme or reason for it's placement, but I didn't notice. Once I got used to everything, it was perfect. Well, now all of the junk is gone, everything is neatly placed, you can walk around freely, and there are no more hiding places. In short, it sucks. I want it back the way it was. I like chaos.

What's a Girl To Do?

Remember the garage door story I mentioned a couple of weeks ago. Well, yesterday the old guy scooped me up, put me in my cage, locked me in and put a towel over the cage so I couldn't see out. The first thing I did was attack and destroy my cat bed. Then I hid under the remnants and listed to six hours worth of the loudest pounding, screeching saws on metal and other obnoxious sounds. When it was over, the towel came up, the cage door opened and there were three new garage doors. Unfortunately, all of the garage stuff which was perfectly placed, was moved. It kind of freaked me out that all of my favorite hiding places weren't there anymore.

The Old Guy kept going in and out the door to the house and so I just lay there and watched him and kind of peeked in. Next thing I know the old guy scoops me up, opens the door to the house and takes me on a tour. Interesting place. I was a little stiff but I finally relaxed. He let me down and I got to walk around in the downstairs area which was full of garage junk. Then he picked me up and took me upstairs. Everything was going ok until I saw the big orange head sleeping on a chair. Well, so much for being relaxed. I puffed up, hissed, growled and the Old Guy ran me back to the garage where he launched me away from him just before I got a good bite on him. Later we took a couple of more trips through the house. I'm sorry but whenever I see the big orange head I freak.

This morning I was meowing before breakfast. The Old Guy brought down the food for Pinot and Chow and placed it where he always does, next to the wire gate. Then he puts out my food near the gate. I'm sorry, but no matter how hungry I am, I have to get a good hiss and growl in when I see the boys. But, no matter how much I hiss or growl, they don't seem very interested in me. What's a girl to do?