Report Card

Pinot:

Cooperation- A
Gets Along With the Help- A
Playtime- A+
Eating- A+
Plays with Others- A
Doesn't Bother Co-tenant- B
Bathtime- A-
Nail Clipping Time- A
Ride Home- A

Overall Grade- A

Comments: Loved the place. Wanted to play everytime someone came in the room. Loved the food. Wanted more playtime with Minette. Told her she was a dud.


Chow Mein:

Cooperation- A
Gets along with Help- A
Playtime- A-
Eating- A
Plays with others- B
Doesn't bother co-tenant- A
Bathtime- C-
Nail Clipping Time- C
Ride Home- B (for once he didn't barf)

Overall Grade- A-

Was ok, but kept complaining saying he wanted to sleep between the Old Guy and Pretty Lady, not with Pinot. Loved the food.

Minette:

Cooperation- D-
Gets Along with Help- D-
Playtime- D
Eating- C
Plays with others- F
Doesn't bother co-tenant- NA
Bathtime- D
Nail Clipping time- D
Ride Home- C- (complained all the way)

Overall Grade: D

Comments: Hated the experience and hissed and growled at the help. Spent most of time in kitty litter. Started to warm up just when it was time to go home. Told help, "Even if you give me Tuna, I won't eat it because I'm on cat-strike."

Home Comming

Accoding to my biological cat-clock, the Old Guy should be picking us up from the cat dungeon in about 5 hours. Can't wait to give him a piece of my mind.

Baaa Humbug!!!!!

Today was a beautiful day in Manhattan Beach. The sun was shining, it was warm, the wind was off shore and Chow, Pinot and I were just relaxing in our various relaxing places: Chow in the newspaper basket, Pinot in his "hammock" which is really the top of a pad on a chair, and me on the hardwood floor, trying to keep cool. Then . . . the Old Guy came home. Well, Pinot and Chow just lay there in their places while I chased him around for a scratch. But he was hard to pin down. First he went in the garage and closed both doors so I couldn't go in. I heard some rumbling around in there but could not tell what he was doing. Then he came out and brushed me out of the way. He walked upstairs to Chow who just lay there looking at him, expecting a scratch. Instead the Old Guy grabbed him and carried him into the garage. When he came out, Pinot was standing next to the door trying to find out what was up. The Old Guy grabbed him and took him into the garage. Well, I didn't know what was going on so I played a little hard to get until the Old Guy cheated by pretending to put more food out. I didn't bite immediately, but eventually, my curiosity got the better of me. Into the kitchen I went . . . trapped like a rat. The Old Guy grabbed me and took me into the garage too. There I saw a truly pathetic site. Chow and Pinot were caged and my cage was waiting. Once inside, the Old Guy put us in the blue car and off we went on Mr. Toad's wild ride to the cat kennel. Seems like the family, without us, is going to NYC. We will be spending our time in El Segundo until after Christmas. All I can say is . . . . [see title above].

Livin' the Good Life in the Cat Condo

Pinot and I have a new cat condo. We used to share the doll house in the garage but we both got too big. And, besides that it was too isolated in there. We want to be where the action is. Today Chow walked by and I had to do the hissy on him. Unfortunately, this condo is only built for two. Sorry Chow.

The Legend of Barbie's Head

Once upon a time, so I'm told by the Old
Guy, Tera owned a Barbie which she and her friends played with. Even Derek played with Barbie when he was young. Well, after the kids grew older Barbie ended up in a box or drawer or some other dark place and was forgotten. Then when the family moved from 7th street, Barbie was also moved, but to a storage unit with many other toys. Last year the Old Guy began cleaning out parts of the storage unit and found Barbie, thinking that the Pretty Little Girl might want to play. So, Barbie came home . . . and got more than she bargained for. This is because there were some small creatures that really enjoyed Barbie. First Pinot, then me. And in the course of discovering Barbie we proceeded to decapitate her, hence the beginning of the legend of Barbie's Head. The legend is that every night Barbie's Head is placed in the cat toy basket, and almost every morning she is found out of the basket, as though she was trying to run and play like she could when she had a body and small children populated the household. Interestingly though, she does have a body, and unlike her head, it just lays in the basket, cold and lifeless. Although she rolls around the house looking for her body, she never finds it until the morning when she can only lay there waiting for the quiet of night, after everyone is asleep. The reality is that try as she might, Barbie's Head will never be permanently reunited with . . . Barbie's Body. Because even though the Old Guy does the reuniting, we rip her head off and send it off wondering the house "on it's own", with our gentle assistance. But the one thing that amazes me . . . she always has a big smile on her face. Yes, Barbie's Head is quite a gal.

The Old Guy Goes Off the Deep End

A very weird thing happened last night. A lot of people came over and ripped up all of the wrapped boxes which the Pretty Lady has been wrapping the last couple of weeks. The weird part about it is that this is exactly what Pinot and I have been doing for the last week, but getting yelled at for doing it. Then they all went to see stuff explode over the Manhattan Pier. When they came back the Old Guy did a cat inventory: Pinot, check; Minette, check; Chow . . . No Chow. The Old Guy freaked. He looked under every bed, in every closet, up on every shelf. You name it, he looked there. Then he went outside and called Chow, positive that one of the guests had let him out of the house. No Chow. He kept doing this and the Pretty Lady was kind of getting annoyed at him because she wanted to rip up more of the boxes. Then the Old Guy went into the garage to search (for the 3rd time). He heard a jingle, looked up and hiding on one of the more isolated and stuffed shelves, Chow peeked over the edge. Of course he wouldn't jump down so the Old Guy had to climb a ladder, at which point Chow dug his claws in to whatever was available, while the Old Guy tried to drag him down. Finally succeeding in dragging Chow out, the bedraggled Old Guy returned to the party. I don't get it. Why not just let Chow be Chow? Heck, all of us cats know that sometimes we just want to be alone. Frankly, I think the Old Guy has lost it. I think the Pretty Lady agrees.

Cat Toys

There's lots of new stuff around here. Yesterday, the Pretty Lady was taking a Christmas present to Sarah. I guess when she put it in the car she didn't look at it too carefully. As she parked the car and grabbed the present she had a chance to look at the wrapping. The top of the present wrapping was cellophane. It was totally ripped to shreds. I guess the Pretty Lady was pretty embarrassed and wondered, probably for not to long a time, how the cellophane got shredded. Beats me.

However, this morning at 5:00 a.m. there was a lot of rustling going on. There are presents all over the place and someone, I won't say who, was attacking them. First on the left, then on the right, then in stereo. The Old Guy finally got up and threw several pillows at the sounds, which then stopped for a few seconds, and then started again, until he got up and yelled like a wild man, stumbling down the stairs while making all kinds of indecent noises. I think that guy should seek professional help!

Pinot Did That II

I've always been a stay-on-the-floor cat. However, lately I've discovered that there is a lot of interesting stuff on the counters, tables, and walls. Today, for example, I discovered that the Pretty Lady puts a lot of stuff on the dining room table. Of particular interest is the center decoration which consists of a round bunch of branches with red berries on them, surrounding a kind of tulip (3 tulips) shaped candle holder. At first I just batted at the branches. Then I started attacking the branches. Next thing I knew, the candle holder fell over and the Old Guy came running. I took off as quickly as possible, but the Old Guy saw me. As I took off I yelled "Pinot Did That!"

Helping the Old Guy

The Old Guy said our rainy season is about to begin. Well if it's anything like my former home, San Francisco, I'm staying inside. The Old Guy decided he had better inspect the roof of the house. So he set the ladder up on the third floor roof so he could climb to the 4th floor roof. Unfortunately for him, Pinot had other uses for the ladder. He said he wanted to check out the surf, birds, bugs and whatever else was out there. Finally, the Old Guy booted Pinot off the ladder so he could get to the next roof. The Old Guy climbed the ladder to the next roof and started his inspection. While he was inspecting, he looked up to see Pinot casually walking by like it was totally normal. Wait a minute. That means he climbed the ladder and jumped to the next roof!! Well, the Old Guy had to grab him, carry him to the edge of the roof, put him on the top of the ladder and hope he climbed down. No problem. Pinot jumped from the top of the ladder to the roof top lounge chairs and laid down. He said he needed a nap after all that work helping out the Old Guy.

I've Got Egg on My Face

Chow and Pinot like to jump up on the counter, or where ever else there is a chance to get food. Me? I'm a floor cat. Plus, I get plenty to eat around this place.

Our normal morning routine is when the Old Guy takes a shower, I come in the bathroom and roll around on the floor hoping to get a scratch from the Old Guy after he gets out. So today, when he came in, there I was. He was holding a plate in his hand which he put on the counter. He came over to me and instead of giving me a scratch, he grabbed me, and picked me up. Now I don't like to be grabbed or picked up unless I initiate the event, so I squirmed with claws out. The next thing I know, I'm on the bathroom counter staring at the plate the Old Guy brought in. Something smelled really good so I sniffed and then licked. Wow!!!!! Fresh fried egg yoke leftover. I licked with all my might. Thanks Old Guy!!!!

PS. Don't tell the resident family veterinarian about this because she has a problem with cats eating people food . . . on the counter . . . on plates. My response is that the only difference between us and Daisy Dog is that Daisy grabs and runs whereas we are confident enough to hold our position. Plus, Daisy has trouble jumping up on the counter.

Knock Knock. Who's There? Pinot!!!!

Sometimes I think the Old Guy is losing it. Today, while he was home making lunch for himself he thought he heard someone knocking on the door. He raced down the stairs, opened the door and no one was there. Then he turned around and realized what he was hearing was Pinot doing a major dig in the kitty litter that sounded just like someone knocking at the door. If you ask me, I think the Old Guy needs professional help.

Cleaning O' the Kitty Litter

One of the big events during the week at our house is when the Old Guy decides to clean the Kitty Litters. We are a 4 kitty litter household, 2 in the house and 2 in the garage. I guess the garage kitty litters are holdovers from my early days. We definitely have our preferences. Me? I prefer the garage kitty litters because that is where I began my stay here. It just seems natural. Chow Mein? He also likes the garage ones. Pinot is an in-the-house kindofguy. He cracks me up. When he is in the kitty litter he yowls. Then when he buries his stuff he goes at it like a construction worker digging a deep hole. You can hear his digging and yowling all over the house.

Back to cleaning day. No matter what time of day or night, whether we are sleeping or awake, when the Old Guy starts to clean the kitty litters we surround him and watch. I don't know what the fascination is but there is something about watching him clean the litter. I suppose one of the questions on our mind is, why on earth does he want that stuff? I mean, yuck!!!!! And yet there he is, digging, sifting, gently placing the material in the bag, and then more digging and sifting until it's all gone. Then on to the next one and more digging and sifting. Then he gently ties up the bag and puts it into a storage container. I don't know what happens after that but this seems really wierd to all of us. Of course we always get the last laugh because as soon as he's done, we all take big dumps!!!!! Ha, ha, ha. Poor Old Guy.

A Tree Grows in . . .

Lots of wierd stuff lately. Thanksgiving? Fagetaboutit. The Old Guy and Pretty Lady left for two days. Instead of Turkey we got two days of crunchies and water. Put that on the list of things that suck.

They got back Friday and then were gone from 2:00 on Saturday 'till midnight. Seems there was some kind of football game that provided lots of ammunition for family arguments. I overheard that the Old Guy, the younger Pretty Lady, the Old Guy's brother, the older Pretty Lady's sister and brother went to the school with the wierd red color and gold color and the older Pretty Lady, the Old Guy's son and the daughter who's a cat doctor, and the Old Guys parents went to the school with the pretty blue and gold color. Everybody says that the younger Pretty Lady's husband wanted to go to the wierd red and gold color school but couldn't get in . . . so he went to some school far away called Har . . . something or other, that also has a wierd red color.

Then on Sunday everyone left early to go to another football game in San Diego to see some old guy who stayed at our house for 2 months earlier this year. He is a quarterback for another team with wierd red colors, from Kansas City. Anyway, the bottom line is that we got lots of crunchies and water and not much else for 5 days.

Ok, so the absolute wierdest thing? Tonight the Old Guy comes home with a big green bush and drags it into the living room and sticks it on a table. I mean this thing is huge. While he was trying to position it in a stand he had, Pinot and Chow jumped up on the table to help. Chow tried to climb the bush and Pinot attacked it. Me? I didn't want to have anything to do with the bush. It looked like it was going to fall on everyone and the Old Guy kept yelling at it and Pinot and Chow and using naughty words. I stood back and watched. A pretty good show if you ask me. However, once he got it upright the really good stuff started. He pulled out long strings of wire with little bulbs on them. I immediately attacked and tried to run off with them. The Old Guy was trying to put them around the bush while I was trying to eat through the wire. Finally, the Old Guy got the wire on the bush and all of a sudden everything lit up red and green. Wow, there's that red thing again. Anyway, Chow, Pinot and I are wating for the Old Guy to go to bed so we can investigate further. Looks like I won't get much sleep tonight.