Wow, That's a Lot of Cat

One and a half pounds of cat was lost this week. Amazingly, Chow, Pinot and I each lost a half pound. Finally all of our hard effort is paying off. While I can't go to the gym like Derek, I can do stairs (with Chow chasing me), sprints (with Pinot chasing me) and long distance (with Derek chasing me). I got quite a work out this week. Everyone is energized, sleeping less, begging for food more and generally eating any live plant we can find (or at least sniffing them 'cause the Old Guy has removed all of the ones we are willing to chomp). Of course there are a few negatives for the Old Guy. Instead of starting to beg for food at 6 a.m., we start at 5:30. When he grills he really can't leave any of the good stuff on the counter while he cleans the grill, even for a second. Last week a single chicken leg mysteriously walked across the room while he was outside. Lucky he caught it before it ran down stairs. Latest count: Chow, 15; Pinot, 15; me, 9 1/2.

I Must Be Depressed

I must be depressed. Don't the experts say that when you are depressed you eat more. Well all of the felines in our house must be depressed. Either that or we are gluttens. I just don't know where we are getting the extra food from. After a one week hiatus the weights are: Me, 9 1/2 lbs (flat line), Chow 15 lbs (no change), Pinot 16 1/2 (a gain of 1/2 lb). How can this be when the Old Guy is starving us, making sure there are mousies all over the place, and we are more frisky, and thus playing, a lot more than before our food rationing started? I'm worried that the Old Guy will begin implementing QE 1/2 (Quantitative Eating 1/2 rations) because he seems none too satisified with the results of the last two week's weigh-ins. I'm letting him know now that if he cuts the food supply, the cat nagging that already goes on in the house will increase proportionately. More next week (actually, less, hopefully).

Lose Weight Now . . . Ask Me How

My strategy has paid off. Between making bread on the Old Guy's lap for 10 minutes a day, fighting with Chow, chasing mouseys and Pinot, and not munching on the plastic or real palms, I have gone into the weight loss lead by losing another 1/2 pound . . . down to 9 1/2 pounds. According to Derek I have lost over 9% of my body weight which leads the pack. Chow reported no loss but may be down another quarter pound. He is starting to look like a normal cat shape. Pinot remains fat and happy. His strategy of finishing his food first so he can poach from the rest of us is obviously his problem.

Pinot's new tactic? 1-800-GET-THIN. That's the phone number for the lap band surgery. The Old Guy told him "No Way!".