Guilt and Patience

The Pretty Lady is in San Diego and so the Old Guy is on his own. The cat grape vine has it that when the Pretty Lady is away, the Old Guy will go to Manhattan Market and buy a fine piece of meat to barbque. And so it was tonight. The smells were intoxicating. Finally, the cooking was completed and he sat down with his steak to watch some kind of game where old guys, in bright uniforms, run into each other and fall down. During this process, some other guys keep yelling out stuff that I don't understand.

Anyway, tonight I learned valuable lessons from the Master, the Sensei of Food, Chow Mein. When the Old Guy was done cooking and had the piece of perfectly cooked meat on his plate, he walked to the couch to watch the brightly clad men with the screaming commentators, and he began to eat. Wow!!! I have never smelled something so good. As soon as he sat down I ran to the couch and jumped up and quickly walked over to the plate of good stuff. However, the Old Guy was very possessive of his food. He kept swating me away. Every time I moved to the meat, he wacked me.

While I was attacking the plate, unnoticed, at least by me, Chow Mein had jumped up on the Wyland coffee table. He sat down staring at the Old Guy. I mean, he just sat there. I kept making a move on the Old Guy's dinner, then getting pushed away on the couch, afterwhich I would would run back to the plate, only to get pushed back again. Chow just sat there, staring. It was surreal. He never even flinched a wisker.

Finally, much to my amazement, the Old Guy gave him a piece of meat, which Chow devoured. I attacked the plate again and again and got nothing. Chow, who sat there stoically, would get a piece every time he finished. Wow!!!!! I humbly Bow to the Chow. He is the Master, the Sensei. He is my hero.

Finally, after my 50th attack, the Old Guy took pity on me and gave me a few tender morsels. It tasted fantastic. But by then Chow had gone and was taking a bath. He said he was . . . full! I bow to the Master Chow.

I asked him what his secret was. He said, "My Daughter, the secret is: Guilt . . . and . . . Patience. The longer you stare, the more Guilt builds up in the Old Guy until he finally gives you the good stuff." Wow!!!! ChowMein, you are wise beyond your years!!!!