The Toilette-Man Commeth

For the last month there has been a large box sitting in the garage with a picture of a toilette on it. This morning the Old Guy pushed and pulled the big box up the stairs while muttering some not so nice words that, frankly, belong in the toilette he was pushing. Shortly after he got the toilette box up in his bedroom, a new guy came into the house. He was there to install the toilette. We adopted our typical positions on this. Pinot followed the guy all over to see what he was doing. Chow slept. I slunk around the house so low my belly was dragging across the floor. I found a few choice hiding places and popped my head out every now and then. Finally, the Old Guy had to pull Pinot back because he was interfering with the installation. Me? I was relieved when he left.

Report Card

Pinot:

Cooperation- A
Gets Along With the Help- A
Playtime- A+
Eating- A+
Plays with Others- A
Doesn't Bother Co-tenant- B
Bathtime- A-
Nail Clipping Time- A
Ride Home- A

Overall Grade- A

Comments: Loved the place. Wanted to play everytime someone came in the room. Loved the food. Wanted more playtime with Minette. Told her she was a dud.


Chow Mein:

Cooperation- A
Gets along with Help- A
Playtime- A-
Eating- A
Plays with others- B
Doesn't bother co-tenant- A
Bathtime- C-
Nail Clipping Time- C
Ride Home- B (for once he didn't barf)

Overall Grade- A-

Was ok, but kept complaining saying he wanted to sleep between the Old Guy and Pretty Lady, not with Pinot. Loved the food.

Minette:

Cooperation- D-
Gets Along with Help- D-
Playtime- D
Eating- C
Plays with others- F
Doesn't bother co-tenant- NA
Bathtime- D
Nail Clipping time- D
Ride Home- C- (complained all the way)

Overall Grade: D

Comments: Hated the experience and hissed and growled at the help. Spent most of time in kitty litter. Started to warm up just when it was time to go home. Told help, "Even if you give me Tuna, I won't eat it because I'm on cat-strike."

Home Comming

Accoding to my biological cat-clock, the Old Guy should be picking us up from the cat dungeon in about 5 hours. Can't wait to give him a piece of my mind.

Baaa Humbug!!!!!

Today was a beautiful day in Manhattan Beach. The sun was shining, it was warm, the wind was off shore and Chow, Pinot and I were just relaxing in our various relaxing places: Chow in the newspaper basket, Pinot in his "hammock" which is really the top of a pad on a chair, and me on the hardwood floor, trying to keep cool. Then . . . the Old Guy came home. Well, Pinot and Chow just lay there in their places while I chased him around for a scratch. But he was hard to pin down. First he went in the garage and closed both doors so I couldn't go in. I heard some rumbling around in there but could not tell what he was doing. Then he came out and brushed me out of the way. He walked upstairs to Chow who just lay there looking at him, expecting a scratch. Instead the Old Guy grabbed him and carried him into the garage. When he came out, Pinot was standing next to the door trying to find out what was up. The Old Guy grabbed him and took him into the garage. Well, I didn't know what was going on so I played a little hard to get until the Old Guy cheated by pretending to put more food out. I didn't bite immediately, but eventually, my curiosity got the better of me. Into the kitchen I went . . . trapped like a rat. The Old Guy grabbed me and took me into the garage too. There I saw a truly pathetic site. Chow and Pinot were caged and my cage was waiting. Once inside, the Old Guy put us in the blue car and off we went on Mr. Toad's wild ride to the cat kennel. Seems like the family, without us, is going to NYC. We will be spending our time in El Segundo until after Christmas. All I can say is . . . . [see title above].

Livin' the Good Life in the Cat Condo

Pinot and I have a new cat condo. We used to share the doll house in the garage but we both got too big. And, besides that it was too isolated in there. We want to be where the action is. Today Chow walked by and I had to do the hissy on him. Unfortunately, this condo is only built for two. Sorry Chow.

The Legend of Barbie's Head

Once upon a time, so I'm told by the Old
Guy, Tera owned a Barbie which she and her friends played with. Even Derek played with Barbie when he was young. Well, after the kids grew older Barbie ended up in a box or drawer or some other dark place and was forgotten. Then when the family moved from 7th street, Barbie was also moved, but to a storage unit with many other toys. Last year the Old Guy began cleaning out parts of the storage unit and found Barbie, thinking that the Pretty Little Girl might want to play. So, Barbie came home . . . and got more than she bargained for. This is because there were some small creatures that really enjoyed Barbie. First Pinot, then me. And in the course of discovering Barbie we proceeded to decapitate her, hence the beginning of the legend of Barbie's Head. The legend is that every night Barbie's Head is placed in the cat toy basket, and almost every morning she is found out of the basket, as though she was trying to run and play like she could when she had a body and small children populated the household. Interestingly though, she does have a body, and unlike her head, it just lays in the basket, cold and lifeless. Although she rolls around the house looking for her body, she never finds it until the morning when she can only lay there waiting for the quiet of night, after everyone is asleep. The reality is that try as she might, Barbie's Head will never be permanently reunited with . . . Barbie's Body. Because even though the Old Guy does the reuniting, we rip her head off and send it off wondering the house "on it's own", with our gentle assistance. But the one thing that amazes me . . . she always has a big smile on her face. Yes, Barbie's Head is quite a gal.

The Old Guy Goes Off the Deep End

A very weird thing happened last night. A lot of people came over and ripped up all of the wrapped boxes which the Pretty Lady has been wrapping the last couple of weeks. The weird part about it is that this is exactly what Pinot and I have been doing for the last week, but getting yelled at for doing it. Then they all went to see stuff explode over the Manhattan Pier. When they came back the Old Guy did a cat inventory: Pinot, check; Minette, check; Chow . . . No Chow. The Old Guy freaked. He looked under every bed, in every closet, up on every shelf. You name it, he looked there. Then he went outside and called Chow, positive that one of the guests had let him out of the house. No Chow. He kept doing this and the Pretty Lady was kind of getting annoyed at him because she wanted to rip up more of the boxes. Then the Old Guy went into the garage to search (for the 3rd time). He heard a jingle, looked up and hiding on one of the more isolated and stuffed shelves, Chow peeked over the edge. Of course he wouldn't jump down so the Old Guy had to climb a ladder, at which point Chow dug his claws in to whatever was available, while the Old Guy tried to drag him down. Finally succeeding in dragging Chow out, the bedraggled Old Guy returned to the party. I don't get it. Why not just let Chow be Chow? Heck, all of us cats know that sometimes we just want to be alone. Frankly, I think the Old Guy has lost it. I think the Pretty Lady agrees.